transformation

I was looking at old pictures today. Reminiscing and missing, as I like to call it. I found this photo, and it brought back a swirl of memories. Africa holds such a dear place in my heart. Because of all that I saw and was a part of yes, but also the journey of Self that I ventured on. My journey to the farthest corners of Earth and Self was the greatest gift I have ever given myself. 


When I look at this photo, I see a very different person. 

I wanted to force myself to look beyond what the mirror shows, and for me the only way to do that was to strip myself of external distraction. I remember looking in the mirror a few weeks later, after the initial buzz and excitement had worn off, somewhere in the sands of Africa alone, and thinking... Who is this person? Who am I? What do I possess of value? And the answers floated in. 


I discovered so much about myself, some good and some bad, but the important thing was that I discovered. I was fearless. Strong. Resilient. I forged ahead into the unknown. It was my rite of passage, and the journey that connected my mind with my soul. I discovered depths of beauty and love and wonder and mystery within myself I had never known existed. Treasures.


I miss this person without hair. Once I returned to Canadian soil, it was interesting to see how people reacted in a society where beauty screams and permeates the air we breathe. I became invisible. And I loved it. I knew that the eyes around me saw nothing, I had nothing to offer the world in terms of standard, physical beauty and because of that the inner treasures I had discovered became more valuable. They say the senses of blind people are heightened because they cannot see; it was kinda like that for me. 


Hm. That's all I suppose. Goodnight.