SURPRISE!

Well, in the age of technology news travels fast and you've probably already heard...

We've created a tiny human!

Due to arrive at Christmas :D

Crazy right... like the most craziest thing you've EVER heard?! Oh, only I feel that way? Ok.

It's still REALLY early (we only got the blood tests back last week) but in Brazil you tell people AS SOON as you know. It's not something that is kept private. Ever. It's so so so weird to me to be telling people already, but when in Rome....

I know what you're probably thinking, "are you out of your mind?! NOW?!"

Well yes, now. Ideally, we'd be married for a few years, move back to Canada, I'd go to school... blah blah blah. But, we don't live in an ideal world. Nothing about our life is normal or "on track" the way I assumed it would be. So things are happening a little off schedule, but let's be real.. is any one of us able to control life?

No. So... let's go with it :)

I also feel like society creates this ideal, of what women are supposed to feel at a time like this. You take the test, you see the pink lines and you're just so happy and full of joy and life is wonderful and little fairies fly around and sprinkle glitter everywhere.

Right?

Maybe some women actually do feel that way. But I feel like I have the right to feel anything I need to at this moment. I made a promise to myself when I got married that I would allow myself to pass through any emotion I felt; sadness, joy, fear, etc. I think it's healthy.

Don't get me wrong, we're really excited. But I'm also terrified. First because well, let's be real - we made a HUMAN BEING and I'm going to be responsible for it. And also, I'm in a foreign country where things are done really differently... I already don't know what's "supposed to happen" or "normal" and now I'm in a place where nothing is the way I think it should be.

For example, most women in Brazil have C-sections. You decide the date you would like to have your child, and you schedule the surgery and do it. It's not very common to have a natural birth.

WHAT?! Right? Isn't that bizarre? We had a friend who was like, "yeah I won't be able to come to your wedding because that's the day my baby is being born."

I don't understand it. Nor will I be doing it that way.

But anyway.

We had our first appointment with an OBGYN this week, and to be honest I didn't really like her. She was kind of cold and I have a feeling we're going to disagree on certain things, and she won't like it. 

But she also seems to be knowledgeable and up to date - and believe me, after the horror stories I see on the news at what happens at some of the hospitals here (you don't want to know, you won't sleep) if I have to choose between someone who is super nice, and someone who is super knowledgeable... well, it's not really an option. Though it made me kinda nervous when she said, "oh you're from Canada? Oh yeah.. it would be so much better to have your baby there. You're doing that, right?" I was like "well... no. That's... not actually an option.." 

So.. yeah. We'd appreciate your positive thoughts and prayers our ways on this new adventure :)